The art of being a victim.

I have always been amazed at how people can victimize themselves while ranting incessantly, praying that a miracle will come solve every problem of theirs. Put down your textbooks, children, because the number one lesson you all should have learnt - but never did, was about how to not shove a problem in your own face and wait for it to disappear by itself. If I were a problem, I'd gladly sit still and screw around with your life, and watch you squirm with that pitiful face on - it really brings pleasure, I promise.

It is YOUR problem.

How many times do I need to remind people that the problem is theirs. There isn't much the world can do for you if you have an unreasonable colleague or partner. You don't expect Kofi Annan to come with a proposal for conflict resolution, do you? And neither should you expect your best friend to solve your problem, simply because it's your problem, not his.

Sitting on the fence only gives you a sore butt.

No, it's not purely about opinion, but not havin any opinion on what is happening to you is only going to make things more difficult for you - and the few listening ears. Do not approach anyone for help without any idea in mind because seriously, if you are too lazy to even think of a solution, what makes you think others should offer their minds to your problem.

Sitting on the fence waiting for an answer only gets you ****ed.

If you called for help while sitting still, I'd gladly help you down. Downwards that is. Stop thinking that everyone in the world is as nice as the kid who helped you up when you fell off the swing at the playground when you were 3. The world might not be an absolutely evil place, but from what I have seen, it isn't very much helpful. How many times have you seen a crowd around a bloodied cyclist? Recall that it usually takes awhile before one idiot yells "Someone call the ambulance!" We humans are downright curious, but downright unhelpful at that.

Why me?

Why you? Because someone from above saw you leaving the toilet without flushing and decided to punish you. Please, stop thinking that you are the only one who doesn't flush. Everyone gets their shares of ups and downs, and it's just that you had a problem on hand while your friends are happy at home watching Desperate Housewives. No one decides that it's you who quarrels with your spouse on Valentines Day, no one plans to crash your computer the night before your presentation - it just happens. And oh, if you think it isn't fair, remember that you might be complaining to a friend over the phone while little kids in Africa are too hungry to even mutter a word. Now, who's the lucky bas***d?

So, Mister-Wise-Guy, what should I do?

Sit down, have a cup of tea, and think things through. Look at your problem again at hand. See what is it you are unhappy about. Then look at the possible causes - that's one hell of a problem actually, the diagnostic portion - and see what you can do to solve the problem or minimise it's impact. There is always a way out. Even losing a game is a way out of it. It is just how you want to exit your current situation that matters to you. You can leave a happy/sad, winner/loser, either way. You can be a happy loser for all I care, and the world would still be like it is today.

Off you go.

Okay, enough of my crap. You still have your problem at hand. So go do what you need to do. Remember, do not call for help unless necessary. Go on, get your butt off the fence.