The mouse that wouldn't click.

I can vividly recall the excitement and ecstasy within me as I carried my new toy home. It was a year and a half ago, and I just blew a hundred bucks ($99 to be exact) on this new little gadget (I was still on an allowance of $300). I've heard plenty of good reviews on it, and it was as if buying one of them gave you a passport to the exclusive club of "Pro Gamers".

Sure, it was a whole third of my monthly budget, but I just couldn't resist the on-sale offer and the temptation of owning one. The Razor Diamondback's body's sleek, with a nice transparent back for it's deep-blue light to shine through. Thinking of how my computer looks like in the night with no lights on, I could see the blue light shining right through the mouse, giving the desk an eerie but cool feel. That's it, I whipped out the NETS card and made my purchase.

When I got home after a train ride that felt like forever, I was greeted by a seemingly harmless question from my mom.

"Hi son, what did you buy?"

I had to lie, I swear. Admitting that I threw a sizable chunk of my monthly dough on a stupid mouse would only draw a reaction that I wouldn't in my life dare to imagine. They weren't total tech-dummies and it was rather obvious from the packaging that I was holding on to a mouse. So okay, opt for the truth - a partial one at least.

"Hi mom. Oh, I got a new mouse 'cos the current one's a little old and faulty."

I then quickly strode into my room, in an attempt to avoid further questioning. Fortunately, she didn't ask of the price. Unfortunately, my dad did.

I quoted a price that anyone would offer to buy my brand-new new-age high-tech pro-gamer mouse for - a slightly under-priced $59. That already drew the attention of 4 wide-opened eyes, staring curiously at my brand-new new-age high-tech pro-gamer mouse, hoping to find value in what seems to be just another mouse.

Thankfully, they took it rather well. My dad was no tech-dummy, neither was he a tech-guru (thankfully so). I guess he believed that $59 was considerably reasonable. At the same time, I witnessed first-hand how the psychology of product-pricing worked.

As for my friends, some questioned the value of the mouse, some questioned the need to spend a third of my pay, and some just asked if they could my brand-new new-age high-tech pro-gamer mouse - smart. My explanation to those who ask of the cost was that if I used it for an entire year, the cost per month wouldn't even be sufficient to buy me a "Portobello Mushroom Burger, switch to Chilli Cheese Fries, please." And if I used it for two years, it would be well worth the money.

But.

But but but. Today, this very day, I realised something: After 18 months, my brand-new new-age high-tech pro-gamer mouse is not clicking it it used to. Can you bloody imagine? The nice crispy clicking is GONE. Kaput. Snafued (I just learnt this yesterday - Situation Normal: All Fouled [****ed] Up.). The once-orgasmic clicking sound is now nothing more than a dull thud.

And guess what, I don't recall having any guarantee on this brand-new new-age high-tech pro-gamer mouse. So there goes my "If I used it for an entire year, the cost per month..." mouse. It's not totally wrecked, but the texture's different. The body's a little scratched (probably from my (mis-)handling), and it feels just like any other mouse now - one that most computer-sellers gladly package into their package deals to cheat you of your money. The only saving grace is that it's movement is still as fluid as ever, and it's sensitivity is still more than I could ask for. Admittedly, I never used more than 3 buttons even though the mouse boasts of 7 programmable buttons. Then again, I'm not much of a pro-gamer.

Having said all these, I still believe that once you've used a Razor, it's almost impossible to revert to a non-descript mouse. The grip, the weight, the entire feel of it, all different. I'm not trying to sound like a computer gamer who draws inspiration from Chinese martial arts masters who teach you the importance of 'being one' with your sword, but I swear that holding a Razor really gives a whole new experience. Even if my brand-new new-age high-tech pro-gamer mouse only lasted 18-months before becoming an old out-dated mid-ranged gaming mouse, I'm glad I made the initial choice to even try it out.

Now, all I can do is wait for reply from technical support to see if my poor pet can get it's nice crispy voice back. Poor thing sounds really as if it's gone dumb, only producing desperate whimpers now. Perhaps they can provide the Viagra my old friend needs to get back to shape.

In the meantime, my poor friend will carry on running around his mat, hoping that someone from tech-support can save him.